Guilty

It's nice to see old friends and family, but I'm ready to get out of here already. It's not that I don't care to be around them, it's just different. This isn't home to me anymore.

Every time I come back, I slowly feel as though I'm being suffocated. Then I panic over getting stuck here again. Never, ever will I live in this stagnant area again. Nothing good has ever come out of it and for good reason.

But Colorado is even further from where I want to be. I think it'll be good for me though. I need to get some things figured out. I am in desperate need of a change. I could use the time to work on myself.

Thus far, I can't say that I've made much progress. I'm still crushed and it doesn't seem as though that'll change any time soon. But it's not a lost cause. It took me a good four months ish to get over Christopher completely. I have from now until the end of summer. It's manageable. I'm just sick of being forced to go through this process. And never have I let someone get me to the point that I feel this horrid. Blehhhhhhhhhh.


On a lighter note, I totally started teaching my mother and aunt the Deceptacon dance. I'm not sure I've ever laughed that hard. We've decided to make everyone learn it for my aunt's wedding in May. Hahaha. Oh brother!