Update

I've had a lot to blog about, but sometimes I get tired of useless whining on the internet about how things suck. Seriously, that's life. Everyone is aware of it. No need to waste my time going on and on about it.

I'll sum it all up in a quick overview:

Drugs are bad.
"I love you" only lasts until a new face comes along.
You always start getting the cold shoulder when you think things are going great.
I have exactly one week until Virginia.
Pride Fest on Sunday!
Two girls have convinced me to stay in Chicago without even knowing I was considering leaving.


That is all for now.

P.S. I love you, Lando.
And yes, you too, Robby.

Away

"Auto Response from ravenannn (7:46:33 AM): Three hours of sleep...then work.
Shoot me, please.

2 weeks and counting 'till the future hubby!
(Wait to shoot me until after, kthx)"




yeah.

16 Days!

Hells yes.




Oh, and Justin Cole apologized today for all of the things he said about me. Making me out to be a horrible person. And supposedly I'm an awesome girl.

He's letting me have Cailey back. Most important part of the story.



Can you believe I was 17 there? Bleh...I have such a warped sense of time.

Wild Killiams

You're such a creeperrr!
Haha.

You have anymore shirtless pics to make the Myyearbook girlies wooo?
You think you're so cool.
Pshhhh!





5.
We're only slightly ridiculous.

VA

18 DAYS!




CHRIS.

Saturday in Waukegan

Mmm, Raab's car.

Another fun filled Saturday.
Nothing like crashing a graduation party and a birthday party of complete strangers both in one day. Haha.

That park was designed to kill.
Props.


Jordan and Calvin on Wednesday.
Waukegan in the city. Woo.
Cumpong X-2 on Friday.

Dan tomorrow.

This week is backed.

Texasss

Dallas was bomb.
And hot as hell.




Next stop, New York!
Okay, okay...southern IL.
Waukegan.
THEN, NY :)



<333

Yum

This is my Taco Bell menu year round.




And I finally had me some today. I swear, it was better than the waffles...sorta.

Jewel Osco

Fuck you.

No Boca?
Screw Huntley.


Butttt, I did get wafflesss.
Hells yes.

Mmm

Back to the suburbs.


But before I leave, who wouldn't fuck Dallas Taylor if they had the chance?!
He's so scummy. Why do I have a thing for dirty boys?




Goddamn!

Fuck

Slight embarrassment.


Has anyone else ever heard of Hellfest?


Mmm, job at 8.
I might as well stay up.



Oh, and so not even.

Why am I Laughing?

Sometimes people say things that are harsh/mean but instead of getting pissed off, I just start laughing...uncontrollably. And why? Because they're so right. I realize this. How can I get mad over them stating the obvious?

I need to get my shit together. Give me two weeks. Two weeks and everything should be great. New apartment. New roommates. Second job. Visit home.

As for this week, it's going to be long and drawn out. Work, work, work. Huntley. Dallas, Texas. Ivan. Waukegan?

Shoot Me

I swore I'd never drink enough to puke again.

Well, I didn't puke. I'm good at holding it in. However, better out than in, right? I should have just let it go. I'm sure I would have felt loads better.

After passing out for about two hours, I woke up to find that he never called me back. Thanks for checking up on me, pal. I wasn't sexually molested by my roommate...that I know of. But again, thanks for caring.

Hope that Aqua Teen was worthwhile.


I have to get out of this apartment. It makes me hate life.

Introducing...

Mmmm...
New Roommates! Ben and Sara.






We will blow your mind together.

360

It's crazy how things can turn around so quickly. Found a GREAT roommate. Be ready for a themed party invite in the very near future. That is, if you're cool enough by me :)

How the heck do I let boys redeem themselves so quickly and easily? What is my deal? I suppose I just prefer to be happy and on good terms if at all possible with everyone. It keeps me happier.

Anywho, it's that time again. I've been loading up on chocolate all day. Great.

Mmmm, some Jack's Mannequin and sleep.

Why Did I Even Wake Up?

I hate thinking this at the end of the day. Sure, Vinnie's slobbery doggy kisses are cute, but sleeping in a bit more wouldn't have been a complete waste. Better than coming home to get ready for work only for my shift to be cancelled because of the fog. And of course, I was already on the train on my way there before getting the call.

My evening went alright enough. I walked around for awhile. It was really nice out. Saw the ex roommate. Miss her. Talked to my mother for awhile. Another lovely conversation about all the kids in Salem getting pregnant. Apparently, that's all they're bred to do down there. Zakary found himself an awesome girlie. I'm happy for him. She seems great. If he's happy, I'm happy.

And to top the night off, I was going to get to see a certain someone's face :) Only, even though it was his idea to come in the first place, he ended up...unmotivated to follow through with the trip?

Auto Response from 'Justin' (9:09:00 PM): Blizazed.
Family guy.

I've never been passed up to get high. But I suppose there's a first for everything. Dude, seriously...fuck.

So, after being super excited over work being cancelled, I know find myself irrated and wishing I were still there finishing my shift at ten. But instead, I'm getting ready to lie down, turn on some This Will Destroy You, and waste the rest of my night away wishing my life were as epic as the music.

Home

I've compiled a list of all that I miss from southern IL.

Zakary.
Jamie Gwaltney.
Mark.
Quinn.
Kiley!
Barak :(
Dusty Bottoms.

Chico's.
Dairy Mart.
Carlyle Lake.
The Reservoir.
The Living Room.

Nights and Denny's and Steak and Shake.

TWO WEEKS.
Two fucking weeks.

Happy Tuesday

Doesn't happen often after a night full of his antics. But at least I met a nice British gent out of it. Too bad he hates the Welsh. I'd make him show me Whales.


DON'T WAKE UP UNTIL 7:30!!!
THEN GET HERE, STAT.
Thanks.



"Other than that, I just think this song is about how ridiculous things can turn out before you even know what has happened."

All My Friends

Get your own playlist at snapdrive.net!

Tell me, if I come do i ever get to go?
Or will you just break down and cry
God bless your soul
When everbody sees we're growing cold
But you don't know
That lately, i've been unable to hold down all the air
And i know i always swore i'd never swear
But i'm growing so damn tired of getting old
And getting cold, God bless my soul

All my friends are telling me
Everything that i could be
And i just smile, but secretly
I think i'm starting to believe
I'm gonna make it out of here

Give me intoxication over sobriety
Give me proof of everything that you believe
I really don't appreciate you preaching to me
Can't you see?
Oh, you'll see that i'm more that just a waste of given space
Or a rejection of your offer of some grace
Cause i know that there's a time and there's a place for me
And i can see

That all my friends are telling me
Everything that i should be
So i just smile, but secretly
I know i'm starting to believe
I'm gonna make it out of here

Girl i swear to you i'll never let them tear my soul out
Try as though they may they'll surely fail without a doubt
Looking back we'll wonder what we were so sad about
The best days of our lives pass by before we figure out

That all my friends believe in me
And everything i'm gonna be
So we just smile, and we start to sing
To anyone and everything
We're gonna make it out
We're gonna make it out
We're gonna make it out
Oh, we've gotta make it out of here

It's Not You, It's Me

One of the most commonly used excuses. I suppose I would be hesitant to believe it as well. But, for once, it's actually the honest truth.

I've made out with 12 guys over the course of the last 6-7 months. I can count the number of guys I've had sex with on THREE hands. I've been used. I've had two one night stands. Only one by choice, in my defense. I drink if it's accessible. I smoke on occasion. Skinny dipping is one of my favorite past times. And, I fall for people like nobody's business.

Now, is that really the type of person you'd want to waste your time on? Seriously, if I'm not happy with some of my choices, I sure the hell know that there are a lot of people that would run in the other direction if they only knew.

I'm learning to be alright with me. But I'm not all for feeling like I've tainted someone that has different morals and values than myself.

Buried Alive

Yes, scary shit, indeed.

I don't know why I continue to read his blog. It just makes me feel like shit almost every time. Even the smallest mention of me or how things went down makes me cringe. I suppose I shouldn't expect much else from him. Maybe I deserve much worse. Maybe one day I'll be balls-ey enough to try and sit him down to discuss it. We'll see. He still seems to want to hang out with me though. I don't know how to react to that. I suppose I'm just use to boys tossing me to the side if all I'm offering is friendship. It makes me that much more grateful to have him as a friend. On top of that, I swear, he's one of the greatest people I've met up here. It's nice to know that he's around.

So This is What it's Like

When did I start calling my mom up just to talk? I swear, I've talked to her more since I moved to Chicago than I did in an entire year back at home. I talk to her like a friend. A best friend. I've never felt more grown up. I always wanted to be included by the adults at family functions. I remember trying to get in on the card games and adult chit chat. And now I'm finally there. I'm being regarded as another one of the adults. I'm not sure if I should be filled with excitement or terrified by the realization that I'm not a little kid anymore.

At the end of a three hour long conversation, I can say one thing. I feel much more at ease. It's always nice to know that if I ever really need something, my family will do whatever they can to help.

Blehhh, almost one in the a.m. I should be heading to bed soon. Seeing JustinJ tomorrow :) Wooo!